I just got an email from my mom with a photo attached. I had to share them both.

Hi Bethany,
I just saw your post & it reminded me of a photo of you. This photo was dated Aug (!) 1978 and I wrote on the back that you did it all by yourself. You were 3 1/2.
Funny, huh? Did you remember this photo?
Love,
Mom

Annalie was digging around in the sparkly pink Caboodles case we use to store the costume jewelry and hair clips she never wears. I idly asked her what she was looking for. “Barrettes,” she answered, handing me a handful. “Can you put all these in my hair for me?”

“Sure,” I said. “You want all of them in your hair?”

“Yes, please.” She rummaged around some more in the case and produced more barrettes. “Oh, and I have to put this one in too, and this one…oh, and this one, of course.”

I gave Annalie’s hair a quick combing and started clipping. We had our usual hairstyling conversation: I remarked that it would go much faster if she would just sit still for two seconds, she responded with her standard but-I-only-wanted-to comeback. Traditions are nice, aren’t they?

The barrettes stayed in her hair for an hour or so, which was 55 minutes longer than I’d expected. I had left Annalie upstairs coloring while I unloaded the dishwasher downstairs, and when I came back upstairs she had moved on to putting various stuffed animals in a toy grocery cart, and there was a neat, colorful pile of discarded barrettes on the cedar chest.

I wish she’d let me put clips in her hair for real occasionally.

Yesterday afternoon I was sitting on the floor in a darkened bedroom at my Aunt Julie’s house, leaning uncomfortably against the side of a recliner. Annalie was lying on the bed on the other side of the chair. I wanted her to nap and had done everything I could think of to encourage her to drift off. She did not want to nap and was doing everything in her meager power to prevent herself from falling asleep. We had reached an impasse.

Now that Annalie is four years old she can get by without a nap most days. But there are still times when she needs the extra sleep, or when I need a break. Usually when I declare it to be a Nap Day, Annalie cooperates willingly enough. She might make some noise about not being tired but once we’ve read stories and I’ve tucked her in, she closes her eyes and goes to sleep.

Then there are days like yesterday. She was tired and really did need a nap, but we were at my aunt’s house and when we’re not at home it’s easier for Annalie to resist sleep. She was extra giggly and hyper and was yawning and rubbing her eyes when she wasn’t singing or flopping around on the bed. She did everything short of tap-dancing on the walls to keep herself awake.

Then there was the fact that yesterday I was tired. I desperately wanted to nap too but Annalie would not go to sleep. With every passing minute I grew more impatient and frustrated. And that’s how I ended up sitting on the floor on the other side of the recliner taking deep breaths. I was so close to losing my temper or crying or possibly running for the hills. I hate that feeling.

The stupid thing was—and I knew this even at the time—if I hadn’t been so tired I would have just read to her, sung her a song, and then left her alone with some books to look at and she probably would have been asleep in ten minutes. But when I’m tired I don’t think straight.

After an hour of epic struggle I declared a truce. I set up my laptop so she could watch the new Veggie Tales DVD and gave her strict instructions to watch quietly while I took a quick nap. Then my aunt came to the rescue (bless her!) and watched the movie with Annalie in another room so I could sleep.

Last night was more of the same. We did the usual away-from-home bedtime routine, and when Annalie hadn’t fallen asleep after I’d laid in bed with her for ten or fifteen minutes, I left the room hoping that would do the trick. But in the end, it took Annalie over an hour and a half to fall asleep in the dark bedroom with me sitting in the recliner with my laptop screen dimmed. I guess she just takes after me.

Yesterday’s sleep struggles are really just a blip on the radar. Usually Annalie goes to bed for naps and at night with much less drama, and in general Annalie and I have been having a great time lately spending time with friends and enjoying summer. I am laughing and rolling my eyes about the whole thing now. But yesterday, I was completely and utterly frustrated.

What’s frustrating you right now?