I was talking to Troy last night about how life just feels so…relentless lately. Of course having a toddler in the house, even one who (touchwoodfingerscrossedtwirlaroundthreetimesandclucklikeachicken) is mostly sleeping through the night, is a lot of work. Troy is still working long hours. I’m still homeschooling Annalie. And it’s the holidays, which means extra items on everyone’s to-do list. Especially with the days getting dark so early, it seems like I am constantly running behind, that I never reach the end of my list.

Troy suggested that maybe right now, just for a little while, I need to cut back on one or two things. I agreed that sounded good in theory. Then I realized: I’m two weeks behind on Flickring photos (which I do mainly for the grandparents, so I’m feeling bad about that). I hadn’t blogged in eight days. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d worked on any of the three big crocheting projects in progress. Aside from some Christmas treats, I’ve barely even cooked dinner in weeks.

Yes, I wrote backwards on my hand just to remind you. You’re welcome.

Now I’m thinking that part of my problem is that I have not been doing much of anything creative lately. Luckily, it’s almost time for 7 Days again. (Note that it starts in the middle of the week this time, this coming Wednesday, the 21st.) That always provides a much-needed jolt of creative energy, not to mention it’s like a quarterly reunion of old friends at this point.

Whatever. It’s life, sometimes it’s crazy, sometimes it’s CRAZY, and usually it’s fun. Christmas is only a week away, and (throwsaltovermyshoulderwishonastarwearsomegarlic) we’re all healthy. We’re not traveling this year so we’re avoiding that stress. Things will get better and I’ll crochet and blog and cook more again someday. This is only a season.

And hey, it’s a season with lots of pretty lights to enjoy.

Until I get the chance to blog about them, please go look at my photos which I’ve lovingly edited and Flickred for your viewing pleasure.

It’s been at least a month now since I’ve managed to blog about anything in a timely manner, and I hate it. It hate how many photos I’ve taken and posts I’ve written in my head that will probably never be published here, because eventually it gets to the point where we just have to move on. I hate it because they’re stories I wanted to tell, and because I’ll probably forget most of them if I don’t write them down.

I kind of hate that I’m writing this post about it, too. It’s so eye-rollingly meta and just plain boring when people blog about how they never have time to blog anymore. Yet here I am, doing that very thing. Arrggh.

I know I have good reasons for being a bad blogger right now. I know I have other things to do. I’m taking care of my family, first of all. I cook meals, I do laundry, I read stories and drive to gymnastics class and feed the cats. I have a baby who eats three meals a day now, which takes up a surprisingly large chunk of time each day. I’ve been busy traveling and entertaining out-of-town guests, which was super fun but frankly exhausting; I’m sure the guests would agree.

I have two baby blankets in progress and am planning to crochet two more before the summer’s over. I’ve painted a half-dozen custom-order mugs recently and have more to paint when I get the chance. I’m frittering away the usual amount of time reading blogs and watching TV, plus additional hours catching up on Fringe. And that’s only the very tippiest-top of the iceberg. Like everyone else I know—except maybe Diane Court—I’m monumentally busy.

But still. I miss blogging.

May has been a busy month. The mosaic above is only a small sample of what we were doing between the 2nd and 11th. That doesn’t even cover the time we spent at my sister- and brother-in-law’s farm with Troy’s mom and stepdad, or having dinner with Jenn and her boys, or Annalie’s zoo birthday party or painting pottery or toasting marshmallows with Katrina & her family and Joe & Kassie.

Or the fact that Sonja and Noah are here now for a two-week visit!

I have tons I want to tell you about. I have photos that I need to edit and Flickr, and blog posts I want to write. I am kind of resigned about the fact that mostly I won’t get to write them, though. I’ll be too busy feeding the baby and teaching Annalie and doing laundry and entertaining our guests and meeting up with friends and taking a quick trip to New York to meet Sarah and Suzy. I’ll do my best though, because I want to be able to read those posts in a year or two and remember this jam-packed, crazy fun month.

How’s your May going so far?

Elliora has been talking in this weird guttural voice lately. It’s pretty funny. My mom took this video of her, with my brother in the background growling back at her.

Elliora is sitting up pretty well now. In just a day or two she went from being able to balance in a sitting position for a second or two, kinda, to being able to sit for 15-20 seconds at a time. I expect by the time we leave Omaha she’ll be walking and reciting her ABCs.

(Sorry for the lazy blogging. I have a half-dozen other posts in my head, but you’re getting videos of my kid sitting instead. I meant to post a photo yesterday for Wordless Wednesday, just a photo, and didn’t even manage that. You’re lucky you’re getting videos.)

I’m sure someday I’ll actually care about blogging again. Right now I can’t seem to be bothered with it. I’m sure it’s because life is just full, what with having a nursing baby and homeschooling Annalie and Troy working crazy hours and cooking and laundry and crocheting baby blankets and sometimes meeting friends to paint pottery and mailing out the occasional care package. Not to mention how we seem to keep taking turns being sick.

It’s not that I don’t care about blogging, even. I want to blog. I guess I just want to do those other things more. Or they’re easier, or they are more necessary, or they give me more personal satisfaction, or they’re easier to do while wearing Elliora in the Ergo and bouncing on an exercise ball. I don’t know.

I guess I have blogged recently, but it doesn’t feel to me like I have. Maybe because recently my posts have either been short or photoless or kind of vent-y? Or maybe because I have thought of a hundred posts I would like to write in the past couple of months but have not had the time or energy to write them in a timely fashion. Especially when they involve getting photos downloaded, edited, and Flickr’d all on the same day.

Right now there are photos on my camera that I could write a lovely post about. I took them today, in the rain. Annalie was outside playing and splashing and dancing around exclaiming over all the violets and daffodils, and Elliora was quiet and big-eyed as she took the world in and listened to the rain pattering on the umbrella above our heads.

But the problem is, they’re still on my camera. And I’m tired. And I have a couple hundred photos from my Omaha trip already on my laptop awaiting editing and posting, and I hate doing things out of order. So that post will likely never get written, and that makes me kinda sad. But I know that right now, I cannot do it all and stay sane. I just can’t. I have to let some things go.

Not to mention that there are lots of other things going on in my life, or at least around me, that I couldn’t blog about anyway. And that always puts a damper on my desire to write here, when I have to hold things back. Nothing terrible is going on, lest you worry. Just stuff that isn’t mine to talk about. You know how it goes. I guess I’ve actually been writing a lot lately, just all of my writing has been to friends or family in emails.

Anyway. I should end this post before it gets any more random and rambly. It’s entirely possible that this crappy-blogging streak is all in my head, because I know about all the posts I’ve wanted to write that have not happened, but you guys don’t. In any case, I hope y’all don’t mind if I occasionally throw a bunch of random photos up here and call it a day.

Cute baby pictures!

Hooray for cute baby pictures! Especially ones with fun expressions.

What’s that? No, you’re not imagining it; these photos are fairly similar. I would probably be more selective and post fewer of these to Flickr, but I know the grandmas want to see every last one of ‘em.

No, seriously, they do! And the aunts and uncles and various friends want to see them too. My mom even wants to see the ones I reject because someone’s eyes are half-closed or moved at the wrong moment. But she has to deal with not seeing them because I usually delete those without downloading them.

The sad part is, I’m not even near being caught up on photos with this post. I haven’t written about Annalie’s gymnastics show, or when Annalie was blowing bubbles using her hand as a wand, or a couple of recipes I promised to blog, or the pottery I’ve painted recently.

I dunno how those of you who read this blog for the crafts or the recipes feel about all these baby pictures, but I guess you can just skip these posts.

But can you really resist this face? Come on.

Hey, there’s me! I’m actually in a picture with Elliora. I need to start handing Troy the camera more often. Time is flying by.

We’re all in various stages of sickness, on the mend but still off-kilter enough that none of us felt very festive today. Troy and Annalie were the only ones well enough to go to Christmas Eve service last night. For my mom and me both it just doesn’t feel like Christmas if we don’t go to church, but we wouldn’t have been able to sing any of the carols or hymns anyway. Annalie got really into the Santa thing this year, though, and wrote a note and put out cookies and milk and treats for the reindeer, which was fun. We opened presents this morning, and had chocolate croissants and sausage and coffee for breakfast. And it snowed a little bit! So all things considered, it could have been a lot worse. But I think we’ll definitely remember this as a weird Christmas. Good thing Elliora isn’t old enough to be disappointed that her first Christmas was kind of a bust.

(In case you’re wondering what happened, Annalie and I both did 7 Days all this past week, I just have not blogged the last five days of photos. You can see them here and here.)

I hope your Christmas was decidedly jollier and less weird than ours.

UPDATE: Comments seem to be getting emailed to me just fine. Thanks, everyone! I’m closing comments on this post now.