Troy is stationed on the USS Tarawa, which is being decommissioned in March. The Navy is retiring the ship from active service after 33 years. This isn’t unusual. It happens all the time. Ships get old. But it’s never happened to one of the ships Troy was on, while he was on it. So this is a new experience for us.

By the time the ship is decommissioned in March, about 90% of the crew will have moved on to their next duty stations. So the ship’s Commanding Officer (CO) decided to have the decommissioning ceremony now, before anyone has left.

A decommissioning is a pretty big deal. Invitations were sent out to the crew’s family and friends, plank owners (the ship’s original crew), former crewmembers, and even former crewmembers from the original ship to bear the name, USS Tarawa (CV40). Former Tarawa CO’s and their families were honored guests along with local dignitaries and a few admirals and generals.

I didn’t really know what to expect from the ceremony itself. When we got there I could see that the ship was decked out with flags and bunting, and that the rails were manned by Sailors and Marines. Troy had mentioned that part to me beforehand, and I’ve seen ships with crewmembers manning the rails before. Each time Troy has gone on a long deployment, at the ship’s homecoming it comes into port with the rails manned. It’s a pretty cool sight.

At first I was so occupied with (1) trying to cough and blow my nose without disturbing everyone around me, and (2) keeping Annalie from disturbing everyone around us, that I wasn’t really paying attention. The names of a bunch of former COs were formally announced, the captain was introduced and gave a short speech, the ship’s chaplain gave the invocation. Annalie saw me taking pictures, and asked for “her” camera so she could take some pictures too.

I was sitting there thinking that it was too bad that of all the ships Troy has been stationed on, this is the one that I feel the least attached to. Troy hasn’t been stationed on Tarawa that long. Half the time he has, Annalie and I have either been still living in Maryland or traveling. I really don’t know any of Troy’s co-workers. On the other two ships Troy was stationed on, we had wardroom functions with the other officers and their families, so I felt connected to those ships. Here that has not been the case.

I was only half-listening to the speakers, a couple of former Tarawa COs, when I started to get more interested in what they were saying. One talked a bit about the Battle of Tarawa in honor of which the ship is named. I knew of the battle but didn’t know anything about it, other than the fact that it was a World War II battle in the Pacific theater. I learned that it was one of the bloodiest battles of the war, with more than 1,600 American casualties and more than 2,000 wounded; while 4,300 Japanese and Koreans lost their lives.

He also talked a bit about the history of this ship, how on her first deployment in the Western Pacific in 1979, the Tarawa rescued 400 Vietnamese refugees who were adrift in the South China Sea. The day after that rescue, one of the refugees gave birth to a baby girl and named her Grace Tarawa Tran.

Tarawa’s current CO, Captain Brian Luther, was the final speaker. He said one thing in particular that I liked so much that I wrote it down: “To serve in the military is hard. We defend rights that we may lose when we don the uniform.” I’ve heard versions of that sentiment before, but it strikes me anew each time. I am so used to life in the Navy that I don’t think about it most of the time. It’s just Troy’s job that happens to require us to move every few years. Of course I am proud of him, and of all our friends who serve. But I think when you’re in the military, or married to someone who is, you can’t spend much time thinking about the sacrifices you make. You just live your life and deal with whatever comes your way and pray for the safety of all the troops.

But yesterday, listening to the CO read the Decommissioning Orders, I was thinking about it. After the orders were read, the CO asked the XO (Executive Officer—second in command of the ship) to report on the status of the ship. The XO then asked each department head in turn to report on the status of his or her department. They each replied with what tasks they had completed, then stated, “X Department is ready for decommissioning.” At the end, the XO reported back to the CO that all departments were ready for decommissioning.

It was a formal and solemn ceremony. I was very aware that I was witnessing an end, and was moved by it. The ship really is empty. Over the past few weeks all the aircraft and computers and weapons and food have been removed and no one is living on board anymore. There are still many tasks to be completed before the ship will truly be ready for decommissioning, but for all intents and purposes Tarawa’s job is done.

After the XO’s final report, the CO gave the order to the Officer of the Deck to haul down the commissioning pennant. Then the CO gave the order to de-man the ship. All the Sailors and Marines who had been manning the rails throughout the ceremony turned and walked in orderly columns down to the quarterdeck and exited the ship.

Afterwards, there was a reception in the hangar bay of the ship. It was impressively planned and catered by the ship’s Supply Department (Troy’s department). As is tradition in the Navy, there was a really freaking big cake. Those Navy cooks sure do frost a mean cake!