turn that frown upside-down
November 21st, 2008
I’ve had one of those days. You know how sometimes you’re just annoyed by everything? Maybe that doesn’t happen to you, but it does happen to me sometimes.
Normally I’m a pretty easy-going person. I roll with the punches and I don’t lose my temper very easily. But once in a while for whatever reason—lack of sleep, hormones, too much time spent around large groups of people, not enough caffeine—I get all snappish and impatient and generally not much fun to be around.
Today there was a whole list of things bugging me. In no particular order:
On top of all these things, today Annalie found this kite we have that folds up into a little zipper pouch. I bought it once to give as a stocking stuffer and then never gave it, so it’s been floating around the house ever since. Annalie really wants to fly that thing, and each time she finds it and asks I tell her (1) kites are Daddy’s department, and (2) it’s really not windy enough here and we should probably take it to the beach.
This afternoon Annalie trailed me around the house for ten minutes asking me over and over and over if we could go fly the kite, pleeeeeeease, but I really wanna fly the kite naaaaaooooow, etc. I patiently repeated items (1) and (2) the first 56 times she asked me. When she asked me the 57th time, I snapped. “Oh, for—GIVE ME THAT KITE.” I grabbed it out of her hand and stuffed it in my top dresser drawer. Then I announced, “I am giving myself a time-out.”
As I marched myself down to the kitchen I could hear Annalie saying wonderingly to Troy, “Mommy’s giving herself a time-out?” Heh. At least my announcement distracted her from getting upset about losing the kite. I poured myself a cup of coffee then went back upstairs to sit on the deck in the sun. The cats came out with me and Lily rubbed against my bent legs as I leaned against the wall, sipping my coffee and taking deep breaths.
My mom and my husband both say that when I am in a bad mood they tend to tiptoe around me a little bit, and that it affects everyone else in the house. When I am my normal self and they tell me this, I feel like a worm. I don’t mean to make everyone feel like they have to walk on eggshells around me, I truly don’t. And I hate the thought that my grumpiness is making them grumpy too. When I am having one of those days the thing that often snaps me out of it is remembering that I could be causing someone else to have a bad day too.
So during my time-out, I drank my coffee and said a prayer and decided, as Lloyd Dobler said, to just be in a good mood. Or to at least fake being in a good mood till the real thing arrived.
It worked. Even though nothing on the above list has changed (except that Troy did call our landlords and leave a message about the faucet), I’m not annoyed to the point of scaring my family anymore. Right now I’m sitting at my desk in our library with my laptop and a cup of coffee, looking out the window and enjoying the evening breeze. I am feeling downright serene.
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Oh I know about those days! I so know about them and applaud you for giving yourself a timeout. I get so irritated that even the fact that the kids are reacting to it makes me more annoyed rather than making me contrite. I’ll make a note of that time out idea :). The pics of Annalie are delightful!
oh my goodness, your daughter is absolutely adorable!
oh & I’ve had those days too and then later feel bad too for inadvertently making other people uncomfortable. The “fake it til you make it” attitude isn’t so bad though!
One more time you have show/teach us the power of a prayer… Thanks for the remainder that we all need a timeout once in a while. :-)
I’m waiting for the day that you tell us that Anaalie sent you for a time-out. :)
Sometimes hormones will make me very tetchy and when I know I’m feeling that way, I’ll try and keep away from everybody – for all our sakes. One parent sees this and keeps away; one parent never spots it. Guess which is which.
I have SO been there. Especially the part about the husband telling the wife that everyone has to walk around on eggshells.
I like that you just “decided” to be in a good mood. That was a great decision. I’ve struggled with doing that, and every time I do, it works. But sometimes I just want to be GRUMPY!
Thank you for sharing something so personal!
I love the photos, that go with the story. Too cute, they must cheer you up.
I so have these days! Tell hubby/mom a little tiptoeing never killed anyone (pretty sure that’s true).
The faking thing … always works for me :)
Oh my gosh, I sooooo know about “those days”. In fact, I’m currently in the middle of one…that has lasted for about a month. Yeah. I’m not always great at rising above my circumstances.
My family probably wishes I would give myself a time-out. Or some happy drugs.
I love that you prayed and then followed the example of the great Lloyd Dobler ’til you found your way back to a place of contentment. (Maybe that’s what I need to do – have a Jon Cusack marathon. “Say Anything.” “The Sure Thing.” Both of them have some HEEE-larious lines. I’m getting the giggles just thinking about “an absolute laugh riot – HaHAAAAA!”)
Great post! Just what I needed. Thanks.
******
P.S. Annalie is ADORABLE. Just too stinking cute for words. I love her name, and since discovering your blog, I’ve wondered it you pronounce it like Anna or like “Onna”. I finally just decided to ask. =)
If Mama ain’t, ain’t nobody happy!
Or, as one of D.’s coworkers (a newlywed) likes to say: Happy wife, happy life!
I had to give myself a time-out last night, too.
Oh, and if the coffee doesn’t help, I can recommend kickboxing. It’s the sport of the future, ya know!
Is it wrong to say that it’s nice to know I’m not the only one?? Melancholy is my strongest temperament – I work hard at not letting it ruin and rule the day. I’m glad you were able to “snap out of it” (as my loving family says! lol!). I may have to try that time out thing… :)
I get in those “funks” as well. In fact, as I was flying home this week I started feeling worse and worse as I thought of all the things piling up in my mind as “huge problems” at home. I guess the fact that our dishwasher is broken (and has been for 3 weeks) isn’t the end of the world, the tile that broke while the painters were here a couple weeks ago isn’t earth-shattering and the fact that I haven’t pushed all the furniture back into exact placement after the painting isn’t crushing. But it all feels so overwhelming, especially when I was dealing with things while getting ready for my race and my husband was out of town for a solid 3 weeks prior to the race.
I’m glad you were able to get in a better mood. Lloyd Dobbler’s got some good wisdom there, I need to remember it more often.
I was feeling nasty today. I was working very hard at trying to pretend I wasn’t…trying to find patience. I found that a 20 minute (unplanned) nap helped a lot. I’m still having to fake it, but I was faking so hard it wore me out. LOL.
Hope it’s gotten better there.
As wise as Lloyd Dobbler was/is, sometimes a time-out is needed. You were wise in realizing that you needed that, recognized it, and did it! Well done, girl. And I agree with Kritter Krit – A John Cusack marathon is always a pick-me-upper. :)
*HUG*
Oh,how I know how that feels. Once I called the cable company to complain that I missed the end of the 10,000 meter race during the Olympics because they decided that was the perfect time to broadcast a Public Service Announcement about a thunder storm that NEVER arrived.
Took a deep breath and DVR’d the rebroadcast at 3am.
I know the mood you speak of. I’ve been letting a lot of things get to me. Things that I have no control over, yet I let them take over me. I hate when I realize I’m sucking the happiness out of the room my whole family is in. I need to remember to give myself a time out more often. Here’s to faking it.
I love the sass in the first picture of Annalie :)
i have to remember this “just being in a good mood thing!”…..
an oh, those hormones…..sometimes i wonder if it’ll all get better once we are in the menopause?!
or after that….?
hope you’re still having a good weekend!
leslie
I had a day like that on Thursday, just everything bummed me out and it started very early in the morning. I was happy when bedtime arrived and I could start fresh on Friday.
I didn’t remember Lloyd Dobbler’s old rule, nor the fact that I used to psych myself up for work sometimes by forcing myself to smile the whole way there and listening to John Mellencamp. I will try to remember the next time I have a day like that.
We all have days like this.
Sometimes, I want to put myself in time out on an hourly basis.
At least we recognize it for what it is… and don’t wall wallow in it…too long. ;-)
Hope your coffee was delicious!
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